Ever wondered why the most successful people seem to have the most stressful lives?
It’s probably not that surprising that this is no coincidence.
But in a world where stress is portrayed as the bad guy and we’re told we should always try to reduce it; what is it about these people that allows them to find harmony in constantly subjecting themselves to such mental and physical extremes?
Are they just built different? Well, maybe.
But their ability to leverage stress for growth is anything but genetic. In fact, the science clearly shows it’s a skill we can all learn.
And it all starts with a single mindset shift.
💡 An Idea To Consider
When we embrace stress, the challenges life throws at us become stepping stones to more resilient, empowered versions of ourselves.
What The Science Says
Stanford psychology Professor Alia Crum's early research on stress mindsets revealed that considering stress as a beneficial aspect of life, rather than a detrimental one, is linked to improved health, emotional well-being, and workplace productivity, even in high-stress situations.
In other words, how you view stress impacts how you handle it.
If you see stress as inherently bad, you’ll resort to using unhelpful coping methods like substance use, procrastinating, or distracting yourself with..well, you name it. You’ll do anything to avoid it.
One study even found that trying to dodge stress increases the risk of long-term problems like depression and job issues.
On the flip side, looking at stress in a positive light encourages better coping strategies, like facing the issue, reaching out for support when you need it, or finding meaning in the situation.
In psychology, these two opposing behavioral tendencies are known as avoidant and proactive coping.
Avoidant coping strategies involve efforts to evade or ignore stressors, often providing temporary relief but contributing to long-term issues.
Proactive coping strategies, on the other hand, entail actively addressing and managing stressors, fostering resilience and positive adaptation in the face of challenges.
TL;DR 👉️ Stress becomes beneficial for us when we lean into it and view it in a positive light.
When is Stress Bad?
Of course, certain kinds of stress can still be unhealthy**.** And we need to be able to identify sources of “bad” stress in our lives.
The science shows that the source of the stress plays a key role as to where it falls on the beneficial-detrimental spectrum.
More specifically, stress tends to have detrimental effects when perceived as involuntary, beyond one's control, and lacking any sense of meaning.
If something is stressing you the f*ck out, and that thing ultimately doesn’t add any meaning to your life, it’s probably not a good kind of stress.
I know that this idea of stress being either good or bad, or good and bad, is hard to wrap your head around.
This quote from Stanford Professor of Psychology Kelly McGonigal helps disambiguate this really well:
Take Action
Consider this your invitation to experiment with a positive outlook on stress and witness the transformative impact it can have on your life.
The next time stress comes knocking, pause and reframe your perspective. View it as an opportunity for growth rather than a roadblock.
Challenge yourself every day to identify one stressor and tackle it head-on—rather than avoiding it—with the knowledge that embracing that stress is propelling you forward.
As you navigate the week ahead, make a conscious effort to replace avoidance strategies with proactive coping mechanisms.
Whether it's addressing a daunting task, reaching out to someone when you’re stuck, or simply finding a positive angle, each small shift contributes to a healthier stress mindset.
Remember, the goal isn’t to eliminate stress but to reshape your relationship with it. By taking these small steps, you're not just managing stress; you're turning it into another vehicle for positive change in your life.
To be successful, you must be willing to do the things today others won’t do in order to have the things tomorrow others won’t have.
- Les Brown
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This was originally published on my weekly newsletter Circadian Growth